The CEO of the Microsoft Organisation, Satya Nadella, recently stated in an interview, whether with intention or by accident, that women should refrain themselves from negotiating and just trust that the organisation they work for will pay them adequately. This angered women all over the world and raised a question of whether women are good negotiators or not. As a woman myself, I believe all women can be great negotiators, and I want them to be the best ones they can be.

“Start out with an ideal and end up with a deal.”- Karl Albrecht

Women Are Powerful Negotiators In The Workplace

How do you become a great negotiator at work? Dump your role as the ‘sweet girl’ at your workplace! Worldwide statistics indicate that most Asian women are too nervous to ask their bosses for a raise because they believe doing so might create the image in the workplace that they are egocentric, overindulgent women. As women, we want to be viewed as selfless problem solvers, rather than problem creators. Thus, some of us become too afraid to ask our boss for a pay increase.

If you have trouble dropping the role of the really sweet, helpful girl at your office, I recommend you think about what you could be giving up if you don’t get the courage to attempt asking for a raise. Don’t you think you have the right to set your own price for the life sacrifices you make and the time you spend away from your family? With the salary you truly deserve, you would be able to enjoy a relaxing holiday at a spa resort or go on a luxurious cruise trip with your family.

If you are still too selfless to convince yourself to enjoy all the pleasures of life, just consider that setting your salary range way below what you deserve also sets the range low for the entire women’s workforce. The next time a more courageous woman in your position asks for a raise, her boss will find the opportunity to use you as an excuse to not grant her request, despite the fact that she is an able worker in the organisation. Also consider that, if you are the best, most qualified employee in your office, but you continue working at a lower salary than your male colleagues, this also sets women’s salary ranges much lower than that of the men in your industry.

Related: Do Women Invest Better Than Men?

Once you determine that you will attempt to negotiate your salary, take some time to research and plan out a process for the negotiation. Your first step is to make sure that you establish a good relationship with all your co-workers, the company or industry in general and, of course, your boss. If you don’t know all your co-workers or if a large segment of the people in your company do not know you by face or name, make an effort to begin building good relationships with all of them.

Before you proceed to the negotiations, make a list of all of your strengths and achievements. Make the list as comprehensive as you can, and use it during negotiations in order to strengthen the position from which you will be speaking. After that, figure out how much you are actually worth to the company and use that information to prove your value. Consider any positive changes to the company that were the result of your hard work. For instance, you can point out that you increased sales by 30% last month.

In this way, you will be able to prove how beneficial your presence is to the company. Finally, rehearse your salary proposal with an individual you are most comfortable with or, if you can, use a career coach.

Women Are Powerful Negotiators At Home

Marriage is complicated. This is true for many women. But, if you stay committed and implement the right strategies, you will find that marriage is less perplexing than you once thought. Compromise with your spouse is significant, ladies. You must work things out carefully and collaboratively so that you and your spouse can both have your wishes fulfilled and your needs met. Negotiation is the key to building a strong, lasting marriage. If you don’t discuss your desires and work to find effective solutions that are suitable for you both, you will not have a happily married life.

Before you begin negotiating with your spouse, please make sure to apply these essential strategies to prevent your discussion from turning into an argument: First and foremost, figure out what you really want to obtain through the negotiation and set it hard into your mind. During the discussion, don’t let yourself drift away from the main point and start negotiating another, or else you will end up with many unresolved issues and an ineffective negotiation. Next, set some rules so that the negotiating experience is satisfying and harmonious.

Discuss all the matters during your conversation with a jovial and optimistic tone. Don’t ever be disrespectful or hurtful. Whenever you sense that the negotiation is getting heated up, pause it and continue it later when the waves appear to be calmer. After that, brainstorm a number of cooperative solutions with your spouse. Finally, choose the solution that is suitable for the both of you.

5 Money Mistakes You Should Avoid in Your Marriage

If, after the negotiation, you and your spouse still cannot reach a mutual resolution, I recommend you think of a solution of your own. For example, let’s say you want to celebrate your freedom by having a night out with your friends during the weekend, which would mean leaving your children with your spouse. However, your spouse would prefer to spend some time alone with you, as a couple. You can solve this dilemma by simply arranging for your children to remain at your or your spouse’s parents’ house while your spouse joins your friends and you for a good night out.

Please do keep in mind that not all negotiations are as easy as you may think. You must show resilience in your pursuit and never give up trying again and again. Meanwhile, you must give the person with whom you are negotiating some time to think. Do not put him or her on the spot.

To ensure harmony, do not make emotional approaches at any time. Always make sure that the goal you are trying to achieve is realistic and not unfit on anyone. Finally, make sure the situation and environment are adequate before beginning your discussion. Bad timing is never the key to a successful negotiation!

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C.E.O @ The New Savvy
Anna Haotanto is passionate about finance, education, women empowerment and children’s issues. Anna has been featured in CNBC, Forbes, The Straits Times, Business Insider, INC and The Peak Singapore. She was nominated and selected for FORTUNE Most Powerful Women conference in 2016 (Asia) and 2015 (San Francisco, Next Gen). Anna has 10 years of experience in the financial sector and is currently a Director in Tera Capital. Her previous work experience includes positions at Citigroup, United Overseas Bank, a regional role in Business Monitor and a boutique private equity firm based in Shanghai. She graduated from Singapore Management University (Finance and Quantitative Finance).